Daily Worst: Midtown Menace
Man, you gotta love MySpace. Where else can you find a Web page with a guy’s self-portrait doing Jazzercise as the background image? Congratulations, Midtown Menace - you’re our Daily Worst (thanks Kat)!
Orientation: Not clear
My first thought was that Menace, the leader of the Atlanta Makeout Club, is gay. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. I mean, how else could someone be so ridiculous and get away with it? But if you scroll down, he lists his orientation as straight! When I look at any picture of Midtown Menace, I hear the sound of Big Gay Al’s voice in my head going “Thuuuper! Thanks for athking!”
Not that there’s anything wrong with that. But come on - that main photo, with the little shorts and everything? Gayer than a cop with a moustache.
WASPs: Let’s Regulate!
Midtown Menace is from the Hamptons. I can’t knock him for that, but I was under the impression that the uppity white folks over there didn’t let their kind go out and make asses of themselves like this. Can we get some regulation here, WASPs?
Some people burn old
photos like these. Some
don’t.
[Wait, can I just stop to drop bombs on Hamptons Online? Look at this beeping pastel piece of sh*t. “Welcome to WASP central!” say the people under Within the Hedges. Within the hedges indeed, you paranoid mofuggas. Say hi to Sherman McCoy for me.
And please don’t miss the Fit Kids feature. The first two photos show kids pigging out, the first pair looking suspiciously Jewish and the second fatty - wild guess - is black (note that he may be sporting gold bridgework, too). But all the healthy kids are all buzzing little WASP-lings! Accident? You decide.]
The tongue: Cut it off!
I just may vomit all over my cat if I see any more photos of Midtown Menace’s tongue. It’s in almost every photo, and it’s not a nice tongue. It’s downright skanky, in fact: all over the place and just “BLAAHHHHHHHHHHHARRRRAAAAAAGGGHHH!”
But why would you vomit all over you cat, Mr. Nutz?
I couldn’t tell you what exactly, but I’m sure he’s done something to deserve it. If you own a cat, you’ll understand.
Conclusions and Suggestions
Might be gay, might not. I don’t, however, have any trouble picturing Menace mouthing the lyrcis “dontcha wish your girfriend was hot like me” out on some throbbing dance floor.
I’m bored. Someone send me naked photos! Short of that, I’ll take your submissions for Worst!
March 6th, 2006 at 10:45 am
that’s a bleeding fzcking ****** right there
true story
March 8th, 2006 at 2:18 pm
He’s gay. No doubt about it.
March 10th, 2006 at 5:55 am
Ok first off how do yu know if he is gay? Have you ever talked to him? He is actually a really great guy and a hugh flirt with the LADIES!!!!
March 11th, 2006 at 4:57 am
a great guy and a flirt with the ladies….
yup, so are ****!!!!!
your friend is a homo, get over it.
you should tell him before someone else has to
March 11th, 2006 at 8:12 pm
For the record, he’s definitely not gay. Utterly mad perhaps…but, definitely not gay.
March 11th, 2006 at 11:00 pm
Ok, we do not know for sure he’s gay, but posting up **** like that is close of an alarm screaming, “flaming homo.” Just like lesbians who have Jewel in there cd collections.
March 12th, 2006 at 5:59 am
Ok, well actually some of us do know for a fact that he’s not gay. I’m sure that this news will break the hearts of many a homosexual, but sorry guys, he’s straight.
March 13th, 2006 at 6:49 am
haha….righ. cause even if he was a homo, he’s not a very good looking one
March 14th, 2006 at 7:35 am
Like Tracy says, he is definately not gay (that is not an assumption on my part), he is just a major flirt and has no problem whatsoever getting girls OR SATISFYING THEM. As far as homeydaclown goes, you might need to take your *** back to the circus where you and the elephants can have a really good time. You are just jealous cause you probably cant get so much as a hand job from a girl, much less be able to feel comfortable with your sexuality enough to not worry about what what ******* like you think!!!!! quit being jealous cause he actually has a life and go get yourself a life!!!!
March 14th, 2006 at 11:06 am
homo… end of story
March 14th, 2006 at 6:41 pm
WTF are you all saying! This dude is totally a ******* homo. Just look at all the women he is with. I mean, if you see a dude with that many women, there’s no way he’s not a homo. I mean, look at him. Homo. What kind of straight guy would party with so many hot chicks? He listens to Daft Punk! Homo. For serious. No doubt in my mind.
If you read the paragraph he wrote about the kind of chicks he likes it proves that he’s just a homo who’s trying to hide the truth that he’s a homo in the closet.
Like James said…homo… end of story.
March 15th, 2006 at 7:37 am
this dude should have his wiener removed with a paring knife. Its just going to waste as is, and he certainly doesnt deserve it. Why not donate it to a *******, or someone that might actually want to act like they have a *****?….i mean, this guy isnt even trying anymore. Im sure, as I type this, he is staring in the mirror fantasizing about having sweet, sweet *** sex with himself.
March 15th, 2006 at 11:41 am
haha…jami is all butthurt over me calling her friend a homo
hey…knock, knock….HE IS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
yeah..the circus and the elephants….that was the most pathetic attempt at an insult i’ve ever seen. nice try corky.
your friend looks like elton johns ******* child. nobody wants to hear about what a great guy he is. HE LOOKS LIKE A FLAMING ***!!!!!
March 15th, 2006 at 12:51 pm
He’s just confused….er..looks it….pityful still
March 15th, 2006 at 2:29 pm
and, let’s be honest, is there anything else that really matters?
March 15th, 2006 at 9:12 pm
What ever mr. clown…….like i said before, you just need to get a life whether it be at the circus, zoo, where the **** ever, but get over it…. believe me, he is not gay he is just very comfortable with himself and i can tell you this Dr. Rosen what the **** your name is, he definately knows how to use it, unlike most men, who dont deserve to have one.
March 16th, 2006 at 12:01 pm
the only thing he has ever used it for is plugging up his (male) friends diarreah problem. Or at least thats the excuse they agreed upon before the sweaty, well manacured ******* took place. Oh, and its “Rosenblat” you dull witted woman of the evening (stupid *****).
March 16th, 2006 at 3:21 pm
now Dr. Rosenbutt, how would you know if i were or were not a ***** and a stupid one at that? seems to me that you are the stupid one whom cannot even spell diarrhea correctly, also, manicured not manacured!!! you need to take classes in spelling sounds like to me STUPID!!
March 17th, 2006 at 5:36 am
haha….always resort to spelling smack when your homo friend is being called out
so fresh.
do your friend actually have to hang out with you?
March 17th, 2006 at 6:38 am
did you just correct my spelling of diarrhea? Are you fuggin’ serious? I bet the only reason you know how to spell that so well is because of the emails you write to your friends telling them how some of your clients like to take liquid dumps on you after you finished the $14 love session. Oh, and i know youre a ******* because i went and saw your myspace…you look all raggity and worn out like a dog’s *** after scooting it accross the driveway. And i bet you smell like old socks. Really old socks.
March 17th, 2006 at 6:43 am
hahahhaha.. i didn’t even look at her profile
shes old….like old as jesus old
i’d be an angry old hag if my cooter looked like something on the arby’s menu too
March 17th, 2006 at 8:43 am
Yeah, that guy is obviously gay. There’s nothing wrong with being gay; everyone is entitled to their own individuality, but just come out of the closet already. Why be ashamed of who you are? As for the girls attempting to defend him, kudos to you but your efforts are futile and borderline pathetic. If the guy is so secure with himself, then any insulting comments said should have no effect. As for you, kids that you’re never going to meet are calling your “friend” gay (it is obvious), and your “defense” is poor and subjective. In short, get over it. Your “friend” IS gay and that’s just something you’re both having to come to terms with some day. Until then, piss off.
Cheers,
Zack Disorder
March 17th, 2006 at 9:43 am
arby’s menu hahahahahahaha! ******* gold.
March 17th, 2006 at 10:41 pm
funny how you went to see my site, how about your sites, are you too ashamed to where you wont even put yours?
March 18th, 2006 at 3:55 am
yes, that’s exactly it….grandma
March 18th, 2006 at 2:11 pm
Wait a sec… did somebody infer that there’s a connection to Daft Punk and being gay?
Whatever, he’s gay, Daft Punk or not. I don’t care what some loose lizards think either. Why do you defend him like a helpless child? He made a blog, a piss-poor one, but at least he can type for himself (I see were still waiting for him to finish poking at his keyboard… maybe he should type with BOTH hands).
And you deny his extreme gayness with phrases like “I KNOW he’s not Gay,” and, “he definately knows how to use it.” WTH is that about? just because he banged some fat, ugly, and lonely I-Net skank doesn’t mean he’s not gay. (Hell, even I have trouble determining if 90% of you gals are even of the human persuasion, let alone “female”). If you really did smear your crusty taco all over his “butt-monkey”, maybe he mistook you for something else too.. or was straight-curious.. or is (*GASP*) Bi and will do anything simply out of desperation (which by the looks of you would be the case).
gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay
GAY.
Reminds me of Morrissey… Gawd, I gonna have nightmares…
March 19th, 2006 at 6:06 am
What I’d like to know is how many that have proclaimed “He’s Gay”, have actually slept with him. That’s just it, if you haven’t, then you really don’t know for sure, do you? LMFAO!
I am amused by some of your theories though, “look at all the women he’s with..he’s gay!”
If I were to begin to guess here, it does sound like jealous might be a determining factor in your opinions.
I suggest some of you sleep with him and return when you actually know what your talking about. Go ahead, I’ll wait }:)
March 19th, 2006 at 7:24 am
why do idiots insist on pulling the jealous card when some polesmoker is called out???
what guy with normal amounts of testosterone would want to look or act(the pics tell a great story) anything like your friend.
it has nothing to do with jealousy…its about helping you get through your severe case of denial.
don’t act like sleeping with a woman somehow makes a man straight. thats about the dumbest fzcking thing you could ever say.
futhermore, how do you know that everyone calling him a homo is even a male?? are the girls jealous that he looks like a walking rainbow too?!?! lolz
March 19th, 2006 at 3:20 pm
In my opinion, insisting he’s gay just SMACKS of either jealous or rejection. The fact that you’re stating it publicly makes it obvious that you’re seeking some type of revenge.
There are a few possibilities that would illicit this response. He is now or was involved with someone you’re interested in. He was involved with you, but ended the relationship for someone else. You’re interested, he’s not. If any of these scenarios were not the case, why would you care so much whether he’s gay or not?
Pics tell a great story? Oh, I do hope you’re kidding.
Unless you’re sleeping with him, the most you’re doing is “***-uming” something you can’t possibly know.
March 19th, 2006 at 3:23 pm
That would be “assuming”. Gotta just love censorship.
March 19th, 2006 at 3:50 pm
I smell a troll.
March 19th, 2006 at 4:04 pm
Mr. Nutz Says:
March 19th, 2006 at 3:50 pm
I smell a troll.
Tracy Says:
Not quite. I’m just a friend.
March 20th, 2006 at 9:07 am
Yeah, you cracked the case columbo…let me be the first to say congrats. I make fun because im jealous that he recieves heafty portions of man meat in his butt. In fact, im fuggin’ sick with jealousy. There are gay dudes out there who get ****** because they are putting on a front, and you stupid ******** will pretty much fall for anything that has $50 and a cylinder of meat between its legs. His pictures with women dont prove ****, those were probably taken during a slumber party or a shopping trip to bloomingdales with “the girls”…and notice there are no pictures of him from behind to show the yellowish *****/lube stains on the back of his new khakis from getting rim jobs in the club’s men’s room. And to the old woman with the roadkill vag, we probably dont link to our pictures because we are smart…we know that linking to wrinkly pictures of our flabby underarms will draw scrutany!